Pumpkin and Apple Rose Tart from The Fitz and The Fool

My father nodded back gravely. He looked at the serving boy. “What is that savory smell?” 

“It’s a beef shoulder, simmered until the meat fell off the bones, with three yellow onions and half a bushel of carrots, and two full measures of this year’s barley. If you order the soup here, sir, you will not get a bowl of brown water with a potato bit at the bottom! And the bread has just come from the oven, and we have summer butter, kept in the cold cellar and yellow as a daisy’s heart. But if you prefer mutton, there are mutton pies likewise stuffed with barley and carrot and onion, in brown crusts so flaky that we must put a plate under them, for they are so tender that otherwise you may end up wearing one! We have sliced pumpkin baked with apples and butter and cream, and …”

“Stop, stop,” my father begged him, “or my belly will burst just listening to you.”

- Fool's Assassin: Book I of the Fitz and the Fool Trilogy, by Robin Hobb

Wow. I quite agree with Fitz here; this mouthwatering passage on the menu at the tavern at Oaksbywater makes me too hungry. While I am tempted to recreate every dish described here, I started first with the baked pumpkin. With autumn arriving this week, irresistibly beautiful gourds have begun to fill the aisles of the grocery store.

The pumpkin and apple combination sounds fantastic for a fall or harvest celebration. But from the description, it isn't clear exactly what shape this dish takes. I considered roasting slices of apple and pumpkin lightly coated in melted butter, served with a cream sauce of some sort, but the passage does imply that the fruits are baked with the cream. After a couple attempts, I eventually settled on a pumpkin and apple tart - sure, the butter is all in the pie crust, but all four mentioned ingredients are baked together. I added a classic pumpkin spice mix, both because it complements the pumpkin and the apple so well, and because it seemed appropriate for the Winterfest setting in Fool's Assassin. I tried using a mandolin to make the thin ribbons of pumpkin and apple, but actually found that a vegetable peeler produced more flexible pieces that were easier to work with.

The spiral or rose petal shape of the pumpkin and apple slices makes for a beautiful dish that would be perfect to bring to a Thanksgiving potluck. The sliced pie pieces look nearly as gorgeous as the unsliced tart, with the alternating orange and cream stripes appearing. With all the spicy pumpkin-y goodness and a more interesting texture, I think I might prefer this pumpkin and apple spiral tart to the classic pumpkin pie.

Ingredients

House Targaryen Madness or Greatness Chocolate Truffles

King Jaehaerys once told me that madness and greatness are two sides of the same coin. Every time a new Targaryen is born, he said, the gods toss the coin in the air and the world holds its breath to see how it will land.

- Daenerys VI, A Storm of Swords

This chocolate surprise was the final course in my Season 7 Game of Thrones party, in which I themed each of the courses around a family of Westeros. The Targaryen family's disposition to mad rulers like the Mad King and legendary monarchs like Aegon the Conqueror is an interesting part of Westerosi lore. While the stories and the quote above make it out to be an either/or phenomenon, I wonder if some of the Targaryens are a little of both? Either way, I wanted to represent this dichotomy in the Targaryen course.

I went with chocolate truffles, which are easy to make, and more importantly, easy to make look the same from the outside while secretly containing a flavor on the inside.  For the "greatness" of the Targaryens, I went with lavender - a soothing flavor, as well as the hereditary Targaryen eye color. For the "madness" of the Targaryens, I went with cayenne pepper and cinnamon - a surprising but still appetizing flavor, evocative of the "fire" portion of the "fire and blood" Targaryen words.

I served the chocolates in tiny gift boxes decorated with the Targaryen emblem, and a miniature scroll with a quote about the Targaryens.

Ingredients

House Lannister Wine and Cheesecake

"Podrick Payne edged his gelding closer. He was carrying the royal standard, Joffrey's great stag-and-lion, and struggling with its weight. Bronn bore Tyrion's own banner, the lion of Lannister gold on crimson."

- Tyrion V, A Storm of Swords

This decadent dessert was served as the dessert course for my Game of Thrones Season 7 party. Each of these courses was designed to look like the sigil for one of the Great Houses of Westeros. I also tried to capture some of the personality of the houses. Lannisters represent themselves with a gold lion on a field of crimson, but they are also recognizable for their prominent display of their considerable wealth. Many of the Lannisters - or at least Tyrion and Cersei - are particularly fond of wine. A rich dessert that incorporated wine therefore seemed fitting, so I went with Shinee's "Cheesecake Bars with Wine Gelée." I then decorated each little cheesecake bar with a golden lion made from stenciled Lustre Dust.

Lustre Dust is a fantastic ingredient to have up your sleeve for kicking your recipes up a notch. Available in many different colors, it is edible glitter. While it is edible, I am not sure if it is digestible. Do Lannisters shit gold? You'll find out! 

Ingredients

Dota 2 The International 7 Viewing Party

"The Echo Slam is there from Gh, the Omnislash - the damage output is too big! With the scythe, Sccc is gone for 2 minutes! The chain frost is bouncing back, Kaka is trying to hide himself but right now it's all Liquid, Liquid, LIQUID! They have taken down four,  you'll get the buyback from the Venomancer. Gh with the force staff - he won't even die for this! Liquid lose nothing but take everything from Newbee!"

- TI7 Grand Finals, Game 3

Not going to lie, I'd been looking forward to TI7 pretty much since TI6 ended. Not just for the great games (which were awesome), but because I think making dota 2 themed food is really fun, and it's nice to have friends understand what my weird-looking desserts are supposed to be. (Check out my TI5 and TI6 posts!)

My favorite from this year ended up being the Lotus Orbs, which are little puff pastry rolls with apple and cherry.  (Get the recipe here!)

The most time consuming dish was definitely the Monkey King Mischief Cupcakes, but I loved how these turned out! I made vanilla cupcakes topped with green vanilla buttercream for the radiant side of the map, and chocolate cupcakes topped with chocolate buttercream frosting for the dire side of the map. I topped them with little edible Monkey King disguises - clarities, couriers, iron branches and trees. Half of the cupcakes are secretly stuffed with banana ganache - if you eat a banana stuffed cupcake, congratulations, you found Monkey King!! (If you're up for the challenge, I have a somewhat more detailed set of instructions and more photos here!)

Dota 2 Monkey King Mischief Cupcakes

"But the Monkey King was born for mischief...and offending the gods never gets old."

- Monkey King hero bio, Dota 2

"Does that clarity look suspicious to you?"

Don't you hate those games where you're chasing down the enemy Monkey King who is at 100 HP, you turn the corner, and then he's gone? Is he on top of that tree? Is he the tree?

For the Dota 2 players who have spent far too long trying to get flying vision of Monkey King, and for the Monkey King spammers who love chilling out in iron branch form for the fun of it, these cupcakes are for you.



Each of these cupcakes is topped with an edible version of some sort of Monkey King mischief disguise: a hard candy clarity, a chocolate and pretzel tree, or fondant couriers and iron branches. But how do you know which of these are just innocent iron branches abandoned on the ground, and which are actually Monkey King in sneaky disguise?

Half the cupcakes are secretly stuffed with banana ganache.

Which was delicious. I was unlucky enough that neither of the two cupcakes I ate during my TI7 Grand Finals viewing party contained a Monkey King filling, but as the chef I got to lick the bowl after stuffing the cupcakes, at least. I suppose I could have stuffed all the cupcakes, but I think that would have defeated the purpose of the cupcake.

We arranged the cupcakes in the shape of the Dota 2 map. Half the cupcakes are vanilla topped with green buttercream frosting. The other half are chocolate cupcakes topped with chocolate buttercream frosting.

Assembling the Cupcakes

Dota 2 Lotus Orb Apple Pastries

"The jewel at its center still reflects a pale image of its creator."

- Flavor text from Dota 2 item descriptions

This imagining of an edible lotus orb is actually my second attempt. Last year I made "Lotus Root Orbs," which were little spheres made out of lotus roots. They were finicky, and not particularly tasty, but I thought the name was pretty funny (and I love creating pun-based foods).

For this year's The International, I decided to go with an approach more similar to the Magic Sticks or the Aghanim's Scepters, where the dish in question looks visually like the in-game Dota 2 item. Lotus Orbs appear to be white petals surrounding a shiny pink core. I toyed around with a couple of ways to make edible flower structures - I even considered savory lotus orbs made from onion flowers. I wanted an option that would be relatively easy to serve at a buffet-style snack table over the course of a 3-6 hour Grand Finals series, and that would consistently produce an attractive dish without being too finicky. In the end, this laundry list of criteria turned out to be best served by apple roses.

If you've ever watched a recipe gif, you've probably seen one for apple roses. There's good reason for their popularity - they look impressive, they're easy to make, and they only require a handful of ingredients. To turn these into lotus orbs, I dusted the "petals" with powder sugar to lighten the petals and added maraschino cherries to the center. With the added pop of color, I think the resulting dish actually looks more adorable than your run-of-the-mill apple roses, and is a pretty good match for a Lotus Orb. And is, of course, delicious.

Lotus Orbs may just be a situational item for most heroes, but I think these are core for any Dota 2 menu.

Ingredients

Popcornelius Fudge

"Come now Harry, the Ministry doesn't send people to Azkaban for blowing up their aunts."

- Minister for Magic Cornelius Fudge, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

This recipe came about as a literal shower thought. There I was, washing my hair like a normal muggle, when the idea of a Harry Potter dessert pun came to mind. Popcornelius Fudge. Does that ever happen to you? A pun so fun you can't not make it?

In developing the recipe, I started with the popcorn. Stale or soggy popcorn is terribly unappealing, so I kept it crisp by coating it in caramel. Building on the "sweet and salty" theme, I thought sea salt and dark chocolate fudge would be the perfect complement for the base. So here it is - a smooth, rich dark chocolate fudge, topped with the salty crunch of caramel popcorn.

Not an experienced candy maker or baker? Not a problem - this 8-ingredient recipe comes together easily and without specialized equipment. Short on time? Want to cut it down to a 4-ingredient dessert? Use store-bought caramel popcorn! Makes for a very fast Harry Potter potluck dish.

Sweet Cakes Soaked With Honey

Catelyn still remembered the innkeep, a fat woman named Masha Heddle who chewed sourleaf night and day and seemed to have an endless supply of smiles and sweet cakes for the children. The sweet cakes had been soaked with honey, rich and heavy on the tongue, but how Catelyn had dreaded those smiles.

- A Game of Thrones, Catelyn V, George R.R. Martin

My re-read of A Game of Thrones last year added many new recipes ideas to my "to-do" list. This one topped the list, because who doesn't love honey? I poked around various medieval recipe sites to see if "sweet cakes" referred to any sort of dish in particular, but this might have been a George R.R. Martin creation. In the end, I selected this recipe from the Receipt Book of Sarah Longe, a beautifully penned cookbook dated to around 1610, because "sugar cakes" seemed to be about as close to "sweet cakes" as I could get.

Review: Alice in Matchaland

"But this White Rabbit laid down a blanket, opened a parasol, and PREPARED HIMSELF A BOWL OF TEA."

- Alice in Matchaland

I received a copy of Alice in Matchland  by Mosoko Miyatsuki for free in exchange for an honest review. Alice in Wonderland is one of my favorite books, so I was excited to see how the creator wove this story into a cookbook.

Clue-Themed Cocktail Party

"It was Ms Scarlett, in The Lounge, with The Candlestick"

I hosted a Clue-themed cocktail party for my birthday this autumn. I decorated my apartment with murder weapons and signs denoting murder locations, and I served one appetizer or dessert and one cocktail for each of the six murder suspects in the classic board game.

Why a Clue-themed party, you ask? Well, other than having fond childhood memories of sitting around the kitchen table, sleuthing with my family, I was at a thrift store and I happened to find a truly ostentatious candlestick (it's even customizable! This is actually only about two-thirds its maximum size!).

Currently taking suggestions for more theme parties where I can use this fabulous candlestick

Dota 2 The International 5 Viewing Party

They're all together. PPD - here comes the ice blast, ready for the dunk in from Universe, it's a disastah! CDEC, they're going to get wiped from the face of the earth -except for Aggresif, he'll jump out. But the wombo combo perfectly hits from Evil Geniuses and they will take Roshan.

- Six million dollar Echo Slam & Ice Blast, EG vs CDEC, TI5 Game Finals game 4

What's a Dota viewing party without Dota consumables? On the menu, we had all your basic starting items: wards, clarities, salves, tangoes and magic sticks. For those brave enough to conquer Roshan, there was of course cheese!

Dota 2 Aghanim's Scepter Madeleines

The scepter of a wizard with demigod-like powers [and a delightful lemon-y flavor].

- (Modified) flavor text from Dota 2 item descriptions

Madeleines are a sort of french sponge cake with a characteristic shell shape. This shape looks conveniently like the jeweled part of an Aghanim's Scepter, the spell upgrading item from Dota 2. With a few crafty additions, they make adorable little Aghanim's Scepters for a Dota 2 eSports Viewing Party. I tried to dub them "Aghaleines" but the name didn't catch on.

‘Unnymoles – a pastry from Redwall Abbey

“Doan’t knoaw wot ee ‘unnymole is? Lukk an’ oi’ll show ee, you’m pay ‘tenshun naow!”

The molebabe rolled out a small patch of pastry, spread it thick with honey and placed on it a strawberry and a raspberry. Wrapping the pastry carefully over the fruit, he coated the lot with a mixture of honey and damson juice. It looked nothing like a honeyed mole, but the molebabes thought it did. Gurrbowl licked his digging claws proudly and added his ‘’unnymole’ to several others on a tray, ready the go into the oven. He wrinkled his nose proudly at skipper.

“Hurr, that’n be ‘ow t’make ‘unnymoles, zurr!”

– Pearls of Lutra, by Brian Jacques

When I was about nine or ten, I raced my way through the Redwall books, devouring each one I could get my paws on. When I didn’t have a new one to read, I re-read my favorite tales of Redwall – perhaps none more than Pearls of Lutra. I loved the riddles and puzzles the abbeyfolk had to solve to save the day – it was a little bit like The Da Vinci Code starring rodents. So, for inspiration for a Redwall August recipe, I went first to Pearls of Lutra.

Game of Thrones Season 6 Finale Party: A Feast at Highgarden

“The war had not touched the fabled bounty of Highgarden. While singers sang & tumblers tumbled, they began with pears poached in wine, and went onto tiny savory fish rolled in salt and cooked crisp, and capons stuffed with onions and mushrooms. There were great loaves of brown bread, mounds of turnips and sweetcorn and pease, immense hams and roast geese and trenchers dripping full of venison stewed with beer and barley. For the sweet, servants brought down trays of pastries from the castle kitchens, cream swans, spun-sugar unicorns, lemon cakes in the shape of roses, spiced honey biscuits and blackberry tarts, apple crisps & wheels of buttery cheese.”

– A Clash of Kings

This elaborate feast greets Catelyn Stark as she meets with Renly Baratheon on behalf of Robb Stark (The King in the North!) at Bitterbridge. It also served as my source material for my third annual Game of Thrones season finale dinner party.

Pokemon Poffins: Keep Stirring!

What I like best about creating food from fictional sources is trying to figure out how to faithfully translate the fantasy world into a real life or modern kitchen’s methods and ingredients. For example, for my Game of Thrones Venison Stew I avoided using flavor-boosting additives like tomato paste or soy sauce that would not have been present in a Westeros castle kitchen. I got a kick out of making Redwall ‘Unnymoles, because the general recipe is laid out clearly in the books. I think these restrictions pose a fun problem to solve.

When I heard about Pokenom, a Pokemon-themed month-long recipe link-up, I searched for some sort of Pokemon food inspiration. Most of the Pokeverse food is fairly simple – fruits, juices, honey… Poffins struck me as a fun project to try because there is an entire Pokemon episode where the gang goes to a poffin cooking class!

Sansa's Favorite Lemon Cakes

Later came sweetbreads and pigeon pie and baked apples fragrant with cinnamon and lemon cakes frosted in sugar, but by then Sansa was so stuffed that she could not manage more than two little lemon cakes, as much as she loved them. She was wondering whether she might attempt a third when the king began to shout.
- Sansa III, A Game of Thrones

Lemon cakes pop up regularly in A Song of Ice and Fire - particularly in Sansa's chapters! Despite their prevalence, there aren't any precise details about their usual appearance or ingredients.